Enter Pirates: Vintage Legends 1991-1999CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform #ad - Humorous essays by New York Times bestseller Laurie Notaro.
Housebroken: Admissions of an Untidy LifeBallantine Books #ad - Housebroken is a rollicking new collection of essays showcasing her irreverent wit and inability to feel shame. From defying nature in the quest to make her own twinkies, to begging her new neighbors not to become urban livestock keepers, to teaching her eight-year-old nephew about hoboes, Notaro recounts her best efforts—and hilarious failures—in keeping a household inches away from being condemned.
Praise for laurie notaro “notaro is a scream, the freak-magnet of a girlfriend you can’t wait to meet for a drink to hear her latest story. The plain dealer “hilarious, fabulously improper, and completely relatable, Notaro is the queen of funny. Celia rivenbark, author of rude bitches make Me Tired“Notaro is direct and self-deprecating, and her disastrous attempts to sew a dress and make jerky treats for her dog are relatable and funny.
Library journal Ballantine Books. After all, home wasn’t built in a day. Notaro chronicles her chronic misfortune in the domestic arts, including cooking, cleaning, and putting on Spanx while sweaty which should technically qualify as an Olympic sport. If laurie notaro’s books don’t inspire pants-wetting fits of laughter, then please consult your physician, because, clearly, your funny bone is broken.
Housebroken: Admissions of an Untidy Life #ad - Jen lancaster, sneaks peeks at her husband’s daily journal, author of i regret nothing#1 New York Times bestselling author Laurie Notaro isn’t exactly a domestic goddess—unless that means she fully embraces her genetic hoarding predisposition, or has made a list of the people she wants on her Apocalypse Survival team her husband’s not on it.
Crossing the Horizon: A NovelGallery Books #ad - Elsie mackay, daughter of an Earl, is the first Englishwoman to get her pilot’s license. Inspired by true events and real people, Notaro vividly evokes this exciting time as her determined heroines vie for the record. Three women, based on real aviatrixes from the early years of aviation, determine to make their mark on history and set out on a thrilling but dangerous mission.
. Soar back to the fearless 1920s with #1 new york times bestselling writer laurie notaro—beloved author of The Idiot Girls’ Action Adventure Club—in a “captivating historical” Kirkus Reviews novel that tells the true, little-known story of three aviatrixes in a race to be the first woman to fly across the Atlantic.
Crossing the Horizon: A Novel #ad - It’s 1927. Mabel boll, a glamorous society darling and former cigar girl, is ardent to make the historic flight. Ballantine Books. Through striking photos, meticulous research, pulling us back in time as the pilots collide, Mabel, and atmospheric prose, struggle, Notaro brings Elsie, and Ruth to life, and literally crash in the chase for fame and a place in aviation history.
Beauty pageant contestant Ruth Elder uses her winnings for flying lessons and becomes the preeminent American girl of the sky. Charles lindberg has inspired millions but no woman has yet embarked on trans-Atlantic flight.
It Looked Different on the Model: Epic Tales of Impending Shame and InfamyVillard #ad - 1 new york times bestsellereveryone’s favorite idiot girl, laurie notaro, is just trying to find the right fit, whether it’s in the adorable blouse that looks charming on the mannequin but leaves her in a literal bind or in her neighborhood after she’s shamefully exposed at a holiday party by delivering a low-quality rendition of “Jingle Bells.
Notaro makes misstep after riotous misstep as she shares tales of marriage and family, including stories about the dog-bark translator that deciphers Notaro’s and her husband’s own “woofs” a little too accurately, the emails from her mother with “FWD” in the subject line “which in email code means Forecasting World Destruction”, and the dead-of-night shopping sprees and Devil Dog–devouring monkeyshines of a creature known as “Ambien Laurie.
It Looked Different on the Model: Epic Tales of Impending Shame and Infamy #ad - At every turn, notaro’s pluck and irresistible candor set the New York Times bestselling author on a journey that’s laugh-out-loud funny and utterly unforgettable. Ballantine Books.
An Idiot Girl's Christmas: True Tales from the Top of the Naughty ListVillard #ad - So whether you find yourself at the dull and smart Party or the Raucous and Stupid Party this holiday season, you’ll always know where to find Laurie–just follow the chocolate trail over to the cheese platter. Welcome to Laurie Notaro’s Christmastime. It’s laurie notaro’s holiday handbook. Prepare to laugh your tinsel off.
It’s the most wonderful–and most dreadful–season of the year, drunken holiday revelers stay long past their welcome, when boxes of truffles attack your thighs, and your grandmother has conniptions at the department store over the price of hand lotion. Ballantine Books. She’ll be the one dialing the cops.
An Idiot Girl's Christmas: True Tales from the Top of the Naughty List #ad - In ten brand-new stories and three previously published favorites, like finding herself on emergency feminine product recon at midnight on Christmas Eve; surrendering to the inevitable Horrible Gift Parade by simply asking for holiday dish towels and giant white underpants from Sears; battling the morons in line at the Seventh Circle of Hell, Notaro shares the sidesplitting daily disasters of the holidays, otherwise known as the do-it-yourself craft store; and trying to live down her reputation as the Most Unfun Christmas Party Guest Ever, due to an unfortunate misunderstanding involving a fake overdose and emergency paramedics.
Working with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Cantankerous Clients, Micromanaging Minions, and Other Supercilious Scourges@throat_punch Books #ad - You do know every sentence doesn't have to start with, “When I was at Princeton…”?The martyrs. If you've ever toiled away in a cubicle or sat through the third meeting your boss scheduled to plan another meeting, then you can relate to this book. This is the third book in jen mann's new york times best-selling People I Want to Punch in the Throatseries and it will not disappoint!This is the book you'll want to accidentally on purpose leave on the desk of that blowhard in marketing.
I literally couldn’t put it down. I barely want to work with you. You get sick days—use one. It was brilliant and gross and hilarious and heartwarming and then hilarious again. Stop dragging your sniffling, coughing, snorting, sneezing ass to work and infecting the rest of us. Ballantine Books. You're not that important.
Working with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Cantankerous Clients, Micromanaging Minions, and Other Supercilious Scourges #ad - Advance praise for working with people i want to punch in the throat:“i’m grateful to all of the people Jen Mann writes about in this book—the condescending managers, the plastic surgeon who helpfully offered free operations during a job interview, undermining editors, and the boss who fired her with a Post-It Note—because they made her into the rage-filled writer we all know and love.
Jancee dunn, author of how not to hate your husband After Kids“I connected with Jen Mann’s book more deeply than I’m comfortable with. This is the book you'll just happen to drop next the microwave in the break room hoping that Jan in accounting reads it before she reheats last night's smelly leftovers for lunch.
The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club: True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy LifeVillard #ad - She writes about a world of hourly-wage jobs that require absolutely no skills, horrific high school reunions, a mother who hands down judgments more forcefully than anyone seated on the Supreme Court, and hangovers that leave her surprised that she woke up in the first place. She delivers the goods: life as we all know it.
The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club: True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life #ad - Ballantine Books. Every day she fearlessly rises from bed to defeat the evil machinations of dolts, dimwits, and creepy boyfriends—and that’s before she even puts on a bra. Back then i said no to using and selling drugs. New york times bestseller“i’ve changed a bit since high school. The misadventures of laurie and her fellow idiot Girls “too cool to be in the Smart Group” unfold in a world that everyone will recognize but no one has ever described so hilariously.
For the past ten years, notaro has been entertaining Phoenix newspaper readers with her wildly amusing autobiographical exploits and unique life experiences. I washed on a normal basis and still had good credit. Introducing laurie notaro, the leader of the Idiot Girls’ Action-Adventure Club.
I Love Everybody and Other Atrocious Lies: True Tales of a Loudmouth GirlVillard #ad - Ballantine Books. Now she’s ready to take on the thirtysomething years. Laurie also explores the backstabbing world of preschoolers at a Halloween party, the X-rated madness of a family trip to Disneyland, and the pressure from her QVC-addicted mother and the rest of the world to reproduce. Here are more scathingly funny tales from the wild side! Laurie Notaro survived the debauched ride of her twenties and the bumpy road to matrimony.
. After maxing out her last good credit card at banana republic, six-foot-plus gretchen “Three Thousand Faces of Eve” before battling the overbearing, she’s dressed for success and ready to face the jungle: surviving feral, overstuffed in way-too-small pants new mom Suzzi, who ruthlessly cancels Laurie’s newspaper column and learns that payback can be a bitch.
I Love Everybody and Other Atrocious Lies: True Tales of a Loudmouth Girl #ad - And almost middle age has never been more hilarious. Laurie is married, and now—miraculously—employed in the corporate world, discovering that bosses come in all shapes, sizes, mortgaged, and degrees of mental stability. I love everybody and other Atrocious Lies is Laurie Notaro at her deliciously quirky best.
But while losing more friends to babies than to booze, she realizes there’s a plus side: at least for a couple of months she gets to be the thinner friend. Can a woman prone to what her loved ones might term “meltdowns” she considers them “Opportunities to Enlighten” put a smile on her face and love everybody? Take a guess.
The Idiot Girl and the Flaming Tantrum of Death: Reflections on Revenge, Germophobia, and Laser Hair RemovalVillard #ad - New york times bestseller • laurie notaro has an uncanny ability to attract insanity—and leave readers doubled over with laughter. Ballantine Books. Join notaro as she experiences the popular phenomenon of laser hair removal because at least one of her chins should be stubble-free; bemoans the scourge of the Open Mouth Coughers on America’s airplanes and in similarly congested areas; welcomes the newest ex-con yay, against her own better judgment, a sex offender! to her neighborhood; and watches, every Discovery Health Channel special on parasites and tapeworms that has ever aired—resulting in an overwhelming fear that a worm the size of a python will soon come a-knocking on her back door.
. Don’t even try. And then there are the lessons she has learned the hard way: Though it may seem like a good idea, it’s best not to hire a tweaked-out homeless guy to clean up your yard. In notaro’s world, strangers are stranger than fiction. Need proof? check out the idiot Girl and the Flaming Tantrum of Death and try not to bust a gut.
The Idiot Girl and the Flaming Tantrum of Death: Reflections on Revenge, Germophobia, and Laser Hair Removal #ad - The plain dealer says that laurie notaro is “a scream, the freak-magnet of a girlfriend you can’t wait to meet for a drink to hear her latest story. With the idiot girl and the flaming tantrum of Death, Notaro proves she’s not only funny but resigned to the fact that you can’t look bad ass in a Prius.
One must always check the hotel bathroom for hobo hairs and consciously remember not to stare at old men with giant man-boobies.